The Arbitrary Nature Of Fear And Worry

This article is about the arbitrary nature of fear and worry and the way that your subconscious ignores most of your ‘real’ fears in favour of just one, specially for you.

If you suffer from one of the many anxieties that modern life offers read on. From fear of being sick, fear of food poisoning, fear of fainting or going mad,fainting,blushing,needing the loo,having a panic attack,looking nervous,public speaking,being trapped; the list is endless.

Anxiety and fear is based on the idea that something bad is going to happen and that the terrible event is too awful to contemplate, it would be earth shattering and must be avoided at all costs.

Yet, is it not strange that so many different people suffer from so many different fears and anxieties, but each person suffers from just one? Yet all of them are rational, in the sense that they are all possible. Somehow the sufferer of a fear of X is very likely not to have a fear of Y, unless you have a fear of mathematics! Very rarely does someone worry about all the possible things that could happen to them. It is as if one fear is enough. We know that dreaded thing could happen, so we spend a lot of time and energy trying to reduce that possibility of that particular thing happening. Planning, avoidance and dread is the order of the day.

In my work as a therapist helping sufferers of anxiety I often ask them why they do not fear all of the other things that could happen in their life. They often respond with the confident assertion;” Oh I will deal with that if it happens”. In other words they cannot be bothered to worry about it in advance, even though the possible experience would be unpleasant and upsetting. They are too busy worrying about their own personal fear to spend time worrying about all the other ones, however possible or rational.

My point here is that the chosen fear is abitrary. The fear could be any one of a hundred possible ‘worst case scenarios’. Yet the subconscious has settled on just the one, leaving the other 99 to chance, with a happy go lucky shrug of the shoulders. We dismiss the 99.

How could this perspective help those that suffer from anxiety?

Well, it often helps to look to your strengths instead of dwelling on your weaknesses. By concentrating on your ability to shrug off all those 99 fears, you can use this fact to help build your confidence. Because you clearly are coping very well in a world of so many possibilities and have a natural ability in dealing with those 99 fears. OK, so you go weak and wobbly at your own chosen fear but look at how you deal with the 99. Resourcefulness is the opposite of anxiety and by musing on your innate happy go lucky attitude to the majority of terrible things that could happen is a confidence builder.

Try it.

Hypnotherapy In London

Misophonia, the panic and anger reaction to sounds

Misophonia is a newly discovered disorder which makes sufferers react to sounds with anger.

Strong negative emotions are induced by certain sounds sending the Misophonia patient into a spin of unwanted feelings and panic attack symptoms and a full “flight or flight” response.

Scientists have discovered that they can trace the way the brain responds to sounds and monitor the route through the brain using MRI scanning. Plotting the direct link between the input of sounds through to the resulting emotional responses. Due to these brain imaging techniques it appears that the brains of Misophonia sufferers are ‘hard wired’ in such a way as to produce the symptoms.

I would be curious to know what makes scientists think that this wiring is ‘hard wired’. If a psychological reaction can be traced through the brain, is that evidence of hard wiring? Cannot all emotions, fears, panics, have a neurological explanation? Would not any emotional response to any trigger, light up the MRI screen in a similar way?

Maybe these MRI scans are supporting scientists in an inaccurate mood of fatalism in how emotional responses occur in a person. Creating the title Misophonia makes the condition ‘genuine’, the scans are ‘evidence of a physical basis’ for the problem and patients are no longer laughed at by their GPs.

What happened to the concept of Neuroplasticity, the ability of the brain to be adaptable? Neurogenesis, the ability to create new neural pathways has been a big feature of neuroscience for the last 20 years.

Neuroplasticity has given much hope to therapists because it supports the patient in their quest for change and development. The old hard wired model of the brain has roots, not only in ideas about the brain, but in Freudian ideology. Freud contended that childhood or even infancy is the time where your future is decided, that your brain (your psychology) is fixed from that early time.

The discovery of how the brain adapts through life, Neurogenesis, gives hope where there was once a fatalism.

My suspicion is that because brain imaging can trace a brain response from a trigger such as sound to an emotion such as anger, scientists are saying that it is a done deal. Look, there is the link on the screen, those links are how things are, no cure.

What about those that suffer from panic attacks? Surely similar brain pathways can be traced. It is well documented that panic attacks are curable, that whatever pathway had been set up in the brain can indeed by re-routed to produce calmer responses. Those that suffer from phobias would have a well defined neurological pathway. Many phobias and panic responses can be treated successfully.

Interestingly researchers have found that the condition worsened in response to cognitive behavioural therapy in one patient.

But surely, if you can talk it up, you can talk it down.

How do you react to alarming health articles? Anxiety?

Did you read this anxiety producing article out today about the risk of sudden death from an undiagnosed faulty heart gene?

According to the British Heart Foundation, 620,000 people in the UK are at risk right now of sudden death due to a faulty gene. That’s right now folks, not next week, today as you read this article.

How are we supposed to react to this news without anxiety? What are we supposed to do? Unless the entire population gets tested immediately how is a ‘sudden death warning’ going to be a warning of any practical help.

Imagine someone shouting out “Fire” in a crowded cinema and then the announcement- “Sudden death is imminent for many of you. There are no fire escapes and more research is needed to make this building safe”.

A warning is useful if you can do something about that warning. But a warning given with no prospect of taking action solely produces anxiety and worry.

Anyone suffering from health anxiety or panic attacks will very likely be adversely effected by this news. Panic attacks thrive on symptoms that mimic heart problems and the chance of ‘sudden death’ is just the news the anxiety needs to ramp up the adrenaline and get the fear muscles working over time.

Increased heart rate (one of the symptoms of the faulty gene) is also one of the main drivers of panic attacks. Awareness of heart rate can easily trigger a self-consciousness about what might be happening in the body. This awareness often increases the heart rate. A vicious cycle of fear and physical symptoms is then produced. The slightest sign of chest pain or breathlessness, can put the sufferer into a spiral of panic.

The mind likes to sort problems – we are problem solving creatures… We have the ability to plan and organise and prepare for many of the looming issues and situations that life can present. We also have the ability to put things off, we would go mad if we had to sort out all possible problems right now. To know that we can deal with something if it happens at a later date is vital to our mental health. This ability to shrug things off is important to our well-being. It gives us the feeling (even if it is an illusion) of control which is calming and allows us to get on with things in the meantime.

Either way, there is plan, sort it now or deal with it later. Immediate problems require immediate action which is why with the headline “Sudden death-more research needed” is a recipe for worry and fear.

My guess is that the article is aimed at the research industry and will indeed encourage ‘more research’. Which is a good thing. Lives will be saved etc.

In the meantime folks, for you and me, it’s…

Another example of Modern Anxiety.

House Of Card Giving Blood Scene

Did you see the episode of House Of Cards where Clare Underwood gives blood. The needle goes right in, no messing. I guess it was genuine. Hard metal going into soft skin, ouch.

I am no needle phobic but watching the needle pierce the skin and a flow of blood down the tube is always a bit alarming. Even less fun if you have a fear of needles.

Maybe seeing someone else getting an injection is easier than the idea of having one yourself but I doubt it. I have treated many needle phobics over the years and just the mention of the needle gets the heart racing, no video needed.

The underside of the arm is a delicate place, soft, sort of private. It’s got veins as well which remind us of razor blades and warm baths, not good. No surprise that we fear the needle. It is a violation of a special place. Combine that with the distrust that many feel about doctors and the way things are done by an uncaring establishment and you get a phobic perfect storm. Hate the phrase but had to use it.

I remember as a child, a whacking big needle going in. My mother watched with alarm. I was more surprised than alarmed but it made quite an impression. Ever since, I have been sympathetic to the needle phobic who needs to be strapped down in order to allow the process to complete.

Even stroking the soft part of the arm is a bit…yuck. Not a nice tickle, maybe it is the thought of all that blood under the surface. Is this grossing you out? Just sharing, you know.

Overcoming the fear, beating the phobia, can be a huge thing for a long term sufferer. It could mean the green light to having a child or important health tests or a gateway to feeling like a normal person. Phobias are normal of course, fear is a human experience but nevertheless reduces our confidence in general.

Trust is such an important factor. Trusting the doctor. The feeling that the needle is not thrust into you by an uncaring world but is all for you, not against you. Also trusting yourself here is important. Trust that you can stay calm, that you deal with a situation that is unpleasant but somehow less than you imagined.

Many phobias appear odd, like a fear of buttons or gravy. But needles makes sense, health anxiety makes sense. The challenge is to accept the weakness and seek to calm the body down thus building trust that you can deal with the situation.

Brilliant how Clare Underwood, the steely President’s wife, smiles her grimace smile throughout. So beautiful, so calm, so cold.

Existential Anxiety, Self Image and Self Esteem

If you feel you are a complete and whole human being then skip this article.

This article is for those who doubt, who seek perfection, who judge, who struggle to avoid failure at all costs, for those who feel something is missing in them. This is for those who need to justify themselves, who struggle to find proof that they are a complete and good person.

In all your shortcomings, your lack, your inadequacies, your failings, did you know that you are perfect at being a human being? How could you be anything else?

Humour me in my therapy-speak, there might be something in this. These ideas are not new but have their uses.

Indulge me for a moment.

A rock is completely and totally a rock. It does not have to explain itself or prove itself, it can’t help but be wholly and truthfully a rock. This is the same for a flower or a cat, neither need to complete any procedure in order to be fully fledged flowers or cats. Whatever happens to them they are totally and fundamentally true and honest beings. Cats and flowers come in all shapes and sizes but they cannot be anything else but themselves.

Humans have consciences and have minds that strive and create and investigate. We have the ability and awareness to judge ourselves and compare ourselves to others or what we <em>could</em> be or feel we <em>should</em> be. However, conscience is another part of being human along with attributes like Origami, basket weaving or singing (OK, birds sing but you know what I mean).

The mind has the ability to think outside the box, to look in on itself and trash what it sees with self consciousness and self criticism. Like the hoover that sucks itself up into nothingness.

However, whatever we think, we are still being human, everything we do and think is human, it is inescapable. We cannot fail at being human.

You may say (and you will.. I know you) that being human is not enough, that we should strive for being more, that inadequacy and weakness is just not good enough and it is lazy to ‘just be human’ and we have no right to let ourselves off the hook. But this striving, this effort to be more than human is simply another aspect of being human.

A flower, however hard it tries, is always a flower, a dog is no less a dog however many rabbits it chases. A dog can be a bad dog but it’s still a dog.

Why am I saying all this?

Mental health is a big issue and how we think about our self-image, self-esteem and confidence is important for mental well-being. Finding ways to be more comfortable in ourselves, to be more at peace could provide an important step for many sufferers.

It is easy to use our minds destructively, to chip away at our true nature and wholeness. The mind is so active and searching and critical that it has the ability to undermine itself and put doubt and guilt and judgement where there could be innocence and wholeness.

Acceptance and forgiveness, new thinking and imagination are cornerstones of a healthy mind. And good therapy.

This article may fail to interest you but it cannot fail to be human.

Andrew Cunningham is director of <a href=”http://www.findinghelp.co.uk&#8221; target=”_hplink”>Finding Help Ltd</a> and runs the popular anxiety magazine site <a href=”http://www.modern-anxiety.com&#8221; target=”_hplink”>Modern Anxiety</a>

Hugh Grant Suffers From Stage Fright. Who new?

Try this piece in Modern Anxiety on Hugh Grant’s stage fright.

Trump Anxiety in the Huffington Post

Trump Anxiety is real.

 

Here is my piece just published in the Huffington Post

 

http://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/andrew-cunningham/are-you-suffering-from-tr_b_13122622.html

Trump Anxiety

 

Modern times bring Modern Anxiety

The Dreaded “What If” or Living in the future…negatively

How much time do we spend thinking about the future? Christmas is coming, plans are being made, holidays booked…or dreaded!

For the person suffering with anxiety the future is a place filled with awful events that they are convinced are going to happen. The mind has already mapped out the future and it’s not looking good.

Part of effective therapy is to wean the fearful client off the habit of the dreaded ‘what if’, the mindset that bullies you into trying to avoid all those things that might happen.

People are not stupid. They are aware of what could or might or even probably happen in the future and whatever you say as a therapist cannot change that fact. The ‘what if’ thoughts are possibilities and not facts. Dragging the client away from their habit of mistaking facts with possibilities can be a big task.

Ready to think differently about the future? Why not? It hasn’t happened yet…so you can think what you like!

Cure A Needle Phobia Or Fear Of Injections

To cure a needle phobia or your fear of injections you  probably need a little help. The phobia is intense as you will know if you suffer from this.

I have been working out of Harley St in Central London for 10 years now helping people with fears and anxieties so email if you have any questions about getting help.

http://www.hypnotherapyinlondon.co.uk/injection_needle_phobia_help_hypnotherapy_hypnosis_london.htm